Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
this must be what syphilis tastes like
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
