I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize