Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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