Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Randomize
