I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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