i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
