Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
