using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Randomize
