I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
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