thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
