your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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