yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
