is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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