I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
