The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
