Capitaan dildo arrescate!
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
