This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
