So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize