Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
