Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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