using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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