Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
