Your tits are I can't wait for
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
