Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
