don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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