i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Randomize
