this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
