You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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