If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
