Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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