bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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