I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
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