brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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