I love black thongs
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
