yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize