guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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