I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Use "feeling words"
Yay
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
