Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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