I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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