I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
