you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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