so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
