I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
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