careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
