Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Terrible idea I love it
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize