The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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