and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
What drink are we having for lunch?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
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