Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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