I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
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