I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
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