I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize