I wanna passion pit in your ass
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
